Convolution Reverb
by AngelicFayth
Summary: A series of oneshot songficts for the Holic universe some AU some not, rated M for future songs. Will have mentions of TRC at points
1. Song 1 Scolding Wife

I contemplated doing this one for TRC having an AU where Fai and Kurogane were married and Fai has Kurogane wrapped around his little finger but unbidden the image of Yuuko came into my head along with a rather overworked Watanuki (and then I started laughing which caused my husband and roommate to stare at me like I had grown a second head). So I set the story up along those lines. I haven't modified the lyrics to my own use except where it says rule within because when I went searching for the lyrics it just gave me question marks so I had to rely on what I hear in the song. The word wife should not be taken literally unless you are of the joking type in which case all the power to you. I also recommend hearing the song unless your not a big fan of Celtic -jig-Newfoundlander music. By the way I am just guessing that Watanuki is living at the store now in the manga cause they don't have any more shots of his home and he keeps waking up in a bed I can only envy.

**Disclaimer – I don't own them and Watanuki keeps hiding from me cause if Yuuko caught him it wouldn't be pretty **

**"Scolding Wife"**

**(Or the ballad of the indentured servant to Yuuko)**

(Cause we all know Watanuki is whipped)

_Well I came into a scolding wife a few short years ago  
And ever since I lead a life of misery and woe  
My wife she is a tyrant around the rule within(1)  
Ah I'd sell her to the devil for a glass or two of gin  
_

Sometimes Watanuki had to wonder why he put up with Yuuko's drunken antics. Until of course he had to go home after work then he wondered why his wish couldn't be granted faster. He had been working for the Space Time Witch for about 2 years now and still had yet to have his wish granted '_Surely no wish can cost this much time_' the thought came unbidden to his mind (conveniently forgetting the fact that Sayoran sacrificed **much** more then 2 years of his life in a glass tube of sorts in order to keep him from disappearing), as most thoughts of that kind appeared he ground nearly to a halt at the thought of working for the rest of his natural life for the conniving woman. The thought of numerous and possibly life threatening situations in which Doumeki was his protector also gave him pause and a mental wince however it would certainly pay the wish faster the witch said.

As Watanuki went to work the following day he continued musing on how long he would actually have to work for Yuuko before his spirit plagued life would revert back to a semblance of outward normalcy that he had never had. As if picking up on his thoughts when he walked into the shop Yuuko was waiting for him eyes half lidded voice somber saying

"Normal doesn't exist Watanuki."

Watanuki could only stare at her completely confused at both her mood and the statement that had just come his way

"Why do you say that Yuuko-san?"

"Because normal is based on outside influences from each individual. Consider how someone in your position may react to not having spirits or the connections you've forged with Doumeki or Himawari-chan."

"But that **would** be normal Yuuko-san." Watanuki said exasperated at having this more than slightly convoluted conversation with Yuuko

"Would it I wonder? To you perhaps but to someone else that type of life may be indescribably dull. Now I want Sake and lots of it." Yuuko's voice went back to the happy-go-lucky state that he has come to associate with her near constant inebriation.

Watanuki could only hang his head as he went to the kitchen both confused and exasperated

_Sure I'll get up and go to work as mild as any man  
And she'll get up and dress herself and go and have her dram  
And I chance to say a word it's well I know my due  
She'll follow me with the fire shovel up and down the room_

And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again  


Between his boss' strange moods as of late and the near-constant want for anything alcoholic Watanuki was feeling a little ill-used so school and consequently dealing with Doumeki was at the bottom of a rather long list of things to do. However he couldn't put off the inevitable and exams were coming up so he had to grin and bear it. _'Though'_ he thought _'if I have to keep on grinning like this I think my proverbial cheeks will fall off'. _

"Oi" Doumeki's voice penetrated his thoughts like a foghorn

"What?" Watanuki's curt reply emphasized to anyone within a 40 foot radius with an iota of intelligence to leave him alone

"Why are you so moody lately?" and apparently Doumeki wasn't one of those people

"You mean aside form Yuuko-san's outrageous demands of alcohol and increasingly hard to make foods the manjuu and the girl's antics and Mugetsu's need for affection?"

"Yes aside from that." Gold eyes drilled into Watanuki's bi-colored eyes

"That's it really." Watanuki said and turned his head

a sigh reached Watanuki's ears and he turned his head to see Doumeki's retreating back

"Ask her for a day off then" Doumeki started walking away back to class "And if you get it I want California rolls for lunch tomorrow"

"I DO NOT TAKE ORDERS!!!" Bellowed Watanuki form where he stood

_  
When I get up at breakfast time she'll tap me on the head  
When I come home at dinner time I'll find her drunk in bed  
When I come home at supper time at patience I must stop  
'Cause she drinks what's in the teapot and I must drink the slop _

_  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again_

As the situation regarding Watanuki deepened he was forced to move into Yuuko's home which made the restraints on his sanity, questionable at best, practically snap with Yuuko wanting such things as Beer for breakfast. '_It's a wonder the woman's liver hasn't imploded with all the liqueur she drinks hell I think if she had an IV with a direct infusion of Sake the world would be a better place-'_ His thoughts were cut off by Yuuko who had come up behind him while he was cooking and said, her tone distinctly amused

"Yes I could do that but it would leave an unsightly marking on my arm and I much prefer adding alcohol to my system the old fashioned way."

Watanuki jumped and nearly burned himself on the stove in his flailing. Yuuko 'tsked' at him disapprovingly

"Though I admire your paranoia and the flailing is really an impressive feat of gymnastics in a closed space don't you think that's it's a tad overmuch?"

"With you Yuuko-san anything is possible I prefer to keep my guard up."

"So you think you will be attacked while you are here?"

"Not exactly but between you the manjuu, the girls and Mugetsu its better to be safe then sorry." Watanuki said and suddenly was smacked on the top of his head by Yuuko's fan.

"I let you live here have you make my food do my chores all in order to grant your wish and you think I'll attack you?" Yuuko sniffled

"You just did!" cried an outraged Watanuki clutching his head

"Nonsense that was merely a tap to get the brain stimulated."

"I classify that as attacking!" huffed Watanuki

"Better finish making those bento's or your going to be late for school" chirped Yuuko as she traipsed out of the kitchen "oh and I have left money for you to get me the ingredients and the list for tonight's dinner and refreshments as well as plenty of wine." Continued Yuuko seemingly oblivious to Watanuki's moan.__

Well once I asked me scolding wife if I could go to bed  
She scare gave me an hour on the pillow to lay me head  
When like a roarin' lion she came bustin' down the door  
She caught me by the middle and threw me naked on the floor 

_  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again  
_

He was exhausted by the time he came back to the place he now called home between dodging spirits and shopping he all but collapsed on the front step.

"Nuki-chan is home"

"Yay Nunki-niisan is home." Began Maru and Moro.

After Watanuki took off his shoes and hoisted the heavy bags up and around his shoulders he had to make his way carefully to the kitchen without breaking any of the fragile bottles inside the bags or tripping over the girls. He almost had a spaz blowout when Mugetsu practically choked him and it was with much relief that he got his items to the kitchen as well as himself in one piece. After making supper for Yuuko and himself and setting up the required bento for Doumeki cause he did indeed get the evening off in a way because all he had to was make supper for the two of them so in all fairness he made the California rolls '_because I have the ingredients on hand'_ the thought to himself unwilling to admit even now that the archer was right. He went to bed in preparation to be able to sleep in somewhat and was woken up scarcely 3 hours later by Yuuko stating that he had to do an emergency job (which happened to be just a liquor run) by the time he had went to the store and come back Yuuko was asleep and he was wide awake and fuming.

_  
Now me and my companions go to a public place  
She'll search around the neighborhood until she finds my face  
She'll hoist me up in ridicule before the company  
Sayin' 'Petticoats is your master and forever more shall be'_

And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again 

He was in foul spirits (pun not intended) when he finally dragged his way to school the next day. He barely was able to muster enough energy to properly greet Himawari-chan and since greeting Doumeki required no energy at all he didn't, which prompted a

"Are you sure you slept all right?" out of Doumeki

"No." was the curt reply

"what happened?"

"Yuuko-san dragged me out of bed at 2 in the morning for a damn booze run and when I get back after doing the damn thing she WASNT EVEN AWAKE!!"

Unable to contain his anger anymore he ranted all the way to his class prompting Himawari to laugh at his antics.

When school let out later that day it was with much trepidation that he made his way back to the shop so instead he cut around though the park sitting on the swings trying to relax but not fall asleep. Also ignoring the spirits he felt more then saw them leave as he heard familiar footsteps come up behind him.

"Shouldn't you be at the shop?" Asked Doumeki form behind Watanuki

"Shouldn't you be minding your own business?" Countered Watanuki but with no real heat

"I saw you take a different way so I wanted to make sure that you weren't about to be attacked."

"I'm fine you can go anytime now"

"Your not fine and your being careless again."

"And you care because?"

"Who else makes me lunch" Watanuki heard the smirk in Doumeki's voice

"Gee thanks for making me feel so appreciated." Watanuki said scathingly back to Doumeki

"Oh but you are appreciated Watanuki" Said an all too familiar voice behind Watanuki suddenly

"Yuuko-san" said Watanuki startled at her sudden presence

"I was worried because you hadn't come back yet" Yuuko continued

"Yuuko-san" Watanuki said proverbial stars in his eyes

"Who would make me dinner if I had found out you had been attacked?" She continued oblivious to Watanuki's spectacular nosedive off the swings. Watanuki got up and dusted himself off and started back to the shop arguing with Doumeki about the bento he was going to make tomorrow "Because Doumeki was kind enough to stay with you when it was getting dark" Yuuko had quipped and not for the last time he wondered how long he was going to be the indentured servant to both Yuuko and Doumeki.

_And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again _

_And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
I swear to God I'll hang meself if I get married again  
And if the devil'd take her I'd thank him for his pain  
Though I swear to God I'll hang myself if I get married again_

"By the way Watanuki" Yuuko said as they were entering the shop

"yes Yuuko-san?"

"I want BOTH wine and sake for dinner tonight." She started laughing as she preceded Watanuki into the store

"YUUKO-SANNN" wailed Watanuki


	2. Song 2 Falling On

**Disclaimer- I don't own them CLAMP does …but were working on visitation rights**

I really love this song and while I was walking home form work it stuck me that this is something totally what Doumeki would say to Watanuki. I intended it darker and more ambiguous but it came out really freaking fluffy… oh well it works none the less.

_Finger Eleven – Falling On_

_  
When you feel so close to some resolve,  
You write the words that you're writing for,  
But your courage gets dissolved,  
Into what, I don't know.  
_

Truth was Doumeki didn't know how to react to Watanuki at first which is why he always kept a stoic face around the easily angered teen. He likened it to walking on eggshells never knowing what would set the seer off. After a while it grew to a routine between them he keeping stoic while being more then slightly (and very quietly) amused at the over the top antics the other preformed. 

When you feel that way again,  
You have to stop your thinking,  
And think of what you're here for,  
And let the rest of your feelings go.  


Doumeki realized much, much later that he had fallen for the pale boy who he had protected time and time again from demons and malevolent ghosts alike. However, as he thought, it was more then likely unrequited love and he was content at keeping the information of his feelings to himself. It turned out to be much harder then he thought due to the fact that he was constantly around Watanuki and there were more then ample opportunities to for things to go awry between them '_or otherwise_' his imaginings taunted him mercilessly.

_  
And you've got to find your balance,  
You've got to realize,  
You've got to try to find what's right before your eyes, oh.  
And if you find you've fallen,  
And all your grace is gone,  
Just scream for me and I'll be what you're falling on, ooh.  
_

Another Incident later where Watanuki came too close to death for Doumeki's comfort caused the archer to come close to snapping at Watanuki however instead he grabbed on to his arms between the elbow and shoulder and held him there in his unrelenting grip and in a quiet voice laced with anxiety and more then a touch of anger asked

"Why do you take these stupid risks?"

"Because I'm the one their after it has nothing to do with you."

"Don't be a moron it has everything to do with me you cant do anything to them so I am needed."

"I was perfectly fine on my own I never asked for your help and I don't intend on asking for it now."

Watanuki forced himself out of Doumeki's grip and started back to his place without looking back and Doumeki was forced to go on home his heart feeling heavy at Watanuki's constant rejection of help and the litany's of "I don't need you". He went to bed a rueful thought floating though his head '_You may not need me Kimihiro but I sure as hell need you_'.

_When you feel so close to some resolve,  
You say the things that you're standing for,  
Don't let your courage get dissolved,  
'Cause it's then that the fear grows,_

Over the next week Doumeki found it even harder to talk to Watanuki due to an archery competition and Valentines coming up nearly simultaneously which made the constant litany of "I don't need a babysitter" and the not so subtle glares he got when he saw the girls surrounding him almost want to force him to break and tell Watanuki, and loudly, that he wasn't interested in anyone but HIM and if he would be kind enough to reciprocate the feelings then his life at the very least would be made much easier. However he didn't and continued to feign disinterest and stoicism which made the seer rant all the more making the archers heart heavy and his personal amusement all the more wry.

_And you've got to find your balance,  
You've got to realize,  
You've got to try to find what's right before your eyes, oh.  
And if you find you're fallin',  
And all your grace is gone,  
Just scream for me and I'll be what you're falling on, ooh.  
Woah, woah.  
_

Doumeki wasn't going to ask Yuuko to assist him in his personal quest to woo the seer but as he found out much to his half chagrin Yuuko was already doing her part to get the two of them together. Only half because it relived the tension between the two of them and they could talk about how frustrated the seer made them with his stubbornness instead of awkward silences filled with too much knowledge. Four bottles of his grandfather's favorite Sake later and Doumeki also had the ability to call Watanuki off from work for a week, which was going to be a surprise after mid-terms were over and golden week started (1) and Doumeki was going to take, drag if he had to, Watanuki over to a cottage that Yuuko had kindly informed him was rented out for a week that they could use. Doumeki smiled at the blatant leer the witch gave him but thanked her all the same.

_Just give me the word and I will be there,  
Just tell me the words that I've been living for,  
Just tell me the things that I've been fighting for,  
It's do or die, this is either or,  
Just give me the word and I will be there.  
Just give me the word and I will be there._

The boys got to the cottage without much incident and although Watanuki was immensely suspicious about the entire thing he was, eventually, cajoled into joining Doumeki for the week.

Doumeki had no illusions about how this week was going to go false or otherwise this was mainly for the benefit of relaxing and not having to worry about being sent on jobs or having the seer have to watch his back every moment while Doumeki was away if Watanuki hadn't come. Also Doumeki was somewhat relieved that Watanuki actually owned something other than some yukatas, pajamas and his school uniforms when Doumeki saw a loose neck shirt and some jeans on the seer he almost dropped his jaw form shock. Even more shocking was the fact that without school or Watanuki's work Watanuki was almost friendly to Doumeki. Doumeki was more than tempted to confess to Watanuki several times that week but always held off thinking that the seer wouldn't return the feelings he was after all infatuated with Kunogi. Going home after the week was like waking up after a pleasant yet melancholy dream to Doumeki's mind. Much was still unresolved and he still didn't know where he stood but he also felt more comfortable around the seer and for now that was enough.

_You've got to find your balance,  
You have to realize,  
You've got to try to find what's right before your eyes, oh.  
And if you find you're fallin',  
And all your grace is gone,  
Just scream for me and I'll be what you're falling on.  
_

The real surprise came later after school was officially over for the summer break. Doumeki was wandering around the night fair thinking about how it would be nice if he had a date or even a friend to be around. He was then startled to see all too familiar bi-colored eyes looking at him through the crowd seemingly if Doumeki had summoned Watanuki here with a thought. Doumeki wove though the crowd mindful of the other people around him while seemingly caught up in that familiar gaze. When Doumeki finally met up with Watanuki they were away form the crowds and beside a large tree overlooking the festival. Doumeki looked enquiringly at Watanuki who simply sat down and patted the ground next to himself for the archer to sit on. Doumeki followed suite and was waiting for the other shoe to drop so to speak when he was surprised by a sudden flash of light and color. Fireworks had been started and it was a welcome distraction form the silence. He nearly jumped out of his yukata when he felt Watanuki's shoulder brush his own and settle there as the seer was making himself comfortable. He turned around and looked into Watanuki's face and asked one out of the now millions of questions swirling around in his head

"Why?"

"Because."

Doumeki quirked his eyebrow clearly confused to witch Watanuki gave a clear if quiet laugh then blushed fiercely and turned away.

"To thank you and to be with you if you don't mind."

Doumeki reached and took Watanuki's hand in his own and squeezed gently it in reply to which Watanuki gently lay his head on Doumeki's shoulder

_You've got to find your balance,  
You've got to realize,  
You've got to try to find what's right before your eyes, oh.  
And if you find you're fallin',  
And all your grace is gone,  
Just scream for me and I'll be what you're falling on, ooh._

A whisper barely audible at all reached Doumeki's ears and it caused him to smile and squeeze the hand he was holding reassuringly

_"Thank you… Shizuka"_

_(1)_ I am totally guessing that they have exams before golden week (equivalent to march break) so if I'm wrong then I apologize profusely

A/N Ok now I know why I should stick to angst I write terrible fluff (and also why I should never let the characters have their own way when I write about them they lead me in totally different directions then I intend).


	3. Song 3 Kagerou

A/N – No I'm not dead (mores the pity I'm sure XD) …I just decided to start drawing maniacally again instead of trying to write since it is a long and arduous process for me (and I tend to fail in epic proportions). I drew a picky of Watanuki "rocking it out on a duster" as quoted by my brother and the fanfic kind of got spawned after that. (the picky can be found under my deviant art account the link is in my profile)

I don't know if its taboo or not to use the second ending theme of an anime in a one-shot songfic especially if it's the anime your doing the songfic FOR. I've never seen it done before but that rarely means anything. The song is Kagerou by BUCK-TICK and (obviously) the Japanese lyrics are in bold the English translations aren't. credit should go to for the lyrics and translations because I couldn't find them anywhere else.

**Disclaimer- Don't own 'em but I like dressing them up and parading them around my DevArt for my own personal enjoyment and the enjoyment of others XD**

**Warning- Definite DouWata just fluff no lemon don't like don't read **

Also Flacedice nudged me to write this story and since I know next to nothing about posting in LJ I posted it here

XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

It took a lot of convincing on Watanuki's part but he was finally able to let Yuuko allow him to play music while he cleaned the treasure room one Sunday. The music coming though surprisingly loud and clear though a beat-up old radio he had dug out of his apartment. '_This was my fathers'_ he mused '_least I think it was…Kami knows I'd never buy something that looks so…old'_. The recent lack of memories were affecting his day to day routine and frankly scared the crap outta him. That coupled with the strange dreams he'd been having lately put him on an edge even Yuuko's generous taunting couldn't break.

_**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume  
Tobitatsu kagerou Koi kogareru **__  
(Pale pink and tangled, in a dream, a midsummer night's dream  
A mayfly takes off, yearning for love)_

The song started on the radio which caused Watanuki to grin a little. He rather liked this song having heard it first when Yuuko played it and the girls with the pork bun doing their air band montage… thing. And despite the obvious correlation between the lyrics of the song and his own situation he found he still liked the song and enjoyed listing to it when he had time to himself (more so when he found out the his beloved Himawari-chan also liked it) '_Hitsuzen my skinny ass' _Watanuki thought with a particular amount of venom grinning wryly.

_  
__**Me ni utsuru no ga warui yume nara  
Me wo tsuburu no wa warui kuse na no  
Tadaima dake wa yoi shirete itai  
Ramushu no umi ni shizumu taiyou**__  
(If it's a bad dream that's reflected in your eyes, isn't it a bad habit to shut them?  
Right now, I'm completely intoxicated; the sun sinks in an ocean of rum)  
_

He stopped dusting and took a moment to listen to that particular lyric as it always struck him as both pertaining to him and in some …rather large way… Yuuko. Completely unrelated yet eternally bound together. Gritting his teeth at the thought of being her eternal servant doomed to endless cleaning, cooking and bizarre jobs he repressed a violent shudder and went back to dusting which despite his overall (and loud) complaining was one of those things he could do which calmed him.

_  
__**Kyou oshii Dareka no namae kuchi zusamu  
Nante suteki na Kono yo wa yume da Anata to yume de aeru**_

_(It's maddening—I hum someone's name to myself  
It's so wonderful, this world is a dream, and in a dream, I can meet you)  
_

Looking around almost furtively he went back to the radio and tuned it up a notch and blushing fiercely (knowing if he was caught he would never EVER hear the end of it no matter how long he lived) he closed his eyes and started to strum the air in front of the duster rocking back on his heels a little humming quietly to himself. Then he gave a little smirk and started all out dancing while continuing to play air guitar with the duster not caring for the moment that he probably looked like the idiot Doumeki was always professing him to be. '_Damnit even when I'm alone I'm thinking of the moron'_ he thinks in a huff

_**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume  
Tobitatsu kagerou Koi kogareru  
Anata wo omoeba Yume ni yume ni yume miru  
Afureru yorokobi Towa ni towa ni**__  
(Pale pink and tangled, in a dream, a midsummer night's dream  
A mayfly takes off, yearning for love  
When I think of you, I'm dreaming, dreaming, dreaming  
Joy overflowing, forever, forever)_

As if in cue (or a poorly disguised plot bunny) an all too familiar voice started singing Watanuki's eyes shot open and he spun around so fast he fell landing painfully on the aforementioned ass. '_SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHI-'_was the only thing his startled mind could produce as he saw Doumeki leading against one of the shelves singing in a rather mellow sounding tenor pitch. Doumeki's eyes were closed and Watanuki held out for the hope that Doumeki hadn't seen him prancing around the storeroom like a 5 year old. However when Doumeki opened his eyes he favored Watanuki with a look and a smirk that betold of bento inducing blackmail that would keep Doumeki fed for the remainder of their schooling **years** together _'and then some if the bastard has his way with it' _thought a disgruntled Watanuki.

_**Moetsukite yuku yume no kakarihi Nami ni kirameku inochi no zanshi  
Kyou oshii dareka no omokage yureteiru**_

_**Maiakaru you ni Maichiru you ni Anata to yume de odoru**__  
(The dream bonfire burning out; the vestiges of life glimmering in the waves  
It's maddening—someone's figure wavers before my eyes  
Like we're soaring, like we're scattering, I dance with you in a dream)  
_

Never pausing in the song Doumeki padded towards Watanuki and stuck out his hand to help him off the floor. Watanuki bit back a groan as he was getting up '_not cause I like his singing or anything but its common politeness not to interrupt…yeah that's it'_. He knew he was denying himself having come to the realization of the scope of his feelings shortly after waking up and being informed of the depth of Doumeki's sacrifice for his sake. He didn't want Doumeki to know though and resolved to keep it bottled up inside him letting it out to fawn over Himawari. Once off the floor instead of releasing his hand Doumeki held it and pulled Watanuki a little closer to him.

_  
__**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume  
Tobitatsu kagerou Koi kogareru  
Anata wo omoeba Yume ni yume ni yume miru  
Afureru yorokobi Towa ni towa ni**__  
(Pale pink and tangled, in a dream, a midsummer night's dream  
A mayfly takes off, yearning for love  
When I think of you, I'm dreaming, dreaming, dreaming  
Joy overflowing, forever, forever)  
_

Doumeki then put his other hand firmly on Watanuki's hip and stated swaying a little to the music, all the while still keeping tempo and tenor to the song never missing a beat. Watanuki albeit rather confused felt a surge of jealousy over that. '_How come he's so damn good at everything?_' he wondered petulantly however the train of thought was broken when the hand of the hip shifted slightly to rest lightly on his waist while still swaying gently to the music. When Watanuki looked down at the offending appendage and then back up at Doumeki his budding rant was nipped by the fact that Doumeki's face (and body Watanuki belatedly noticed) were now a whole hell of a lot closer to his own then just a few seconds ago. Doumeki's gaze was burning into his own with an unidentifiable emotion

_  
__**Ito oshii Anata wo omoi yami kakeru  
Tobira ga hiraku Sekai ga hiraku Kono yo ni ikita akashi**__  
(It's precious—I think of you and run through the darkness  
The doors open, the world opens; it's proof that I've lived in this world)_

The hand around his wait shifted slightly so it was fully supporting him across his back and the hand that was holding his hand firmly let go to cup Watanuki's cheek then slid down to his chin holding it while Doumeki's face inched forward, so close now their breath was mingling and their noses touching. Watanuki felt the barest pressing of lips against his soft, light and over in an instant and suddenly as if a dam had finally broken he had pressed himself against Doumeki and clinging to him like one drowning and started kissing him for all he was worth. Unbidden tears welled flowing from his closed eyes hoping this and what he was finally allowing himself to feel wasn't all a cruel game on the wheel of Hitsuzen. Hands hard and calloused yet gentle caressing his face tenderly wiping the tears away caused Watanuki to open his eyes again. Suddenly scared Watanuki made a move to back away before he crossed another of those fine lines again and there was no going back '_not that there was any going back after that display'_ he thought to himself wryly. However the hand now around his waist again didn't budge an inch and Doumeki looked at him again with that now not so unidentifiable emotion blazing in his golden eyes. What seemed like an eternity later breath mingled and their lips met again the kiss turning deep shortly after that.

_  
__**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume  
Tobitatsu kagerou Koi kogareru  
Anata wo omoeba Yume ni yume ni yume miru  
Afureru yorokobi Towa ni towa ni**__  
(Pale pink and tangled, in a dream, a midsummer night's dream  
A mayfly takes off, yearning for love  
When I think of you, I'm dreaming, dreaming, dreaming  
Joy overflowing, forever, forever)_

Watanuki's thoughts were in a whirl as he hung on to Doumeki parting only momentarily for breath as they mutually attacked each others lips again. Realizing that the denial he had been building up around him like a wall was finally shattered and he was going to have to finally admit into his life the one person he had been trying so hard to keep out for fear of him getting hurt or even killed. Watanuki gazed into Doumeki's eyes and saw that this, THIS was the accumulation of all the choices he had made this was the reasoning for all of them. Watanuki realized that Doumeki could choose and did weather or not Watanuki wanted him to, like with the spirit woman. Doumeki, Watanuki realized as he broke away panting harshly for breath only to be attacked again drawn deeper and deeper into another kiss, was not Hitsuzen's plaything and therefore his choices carried much more weight then Watanuki's own and impacted others far more. It was all Watanuki could do not to fall into an semi incoherent pile of goo when he thought to himself with smug pride '_and its me he chooses after all too'_

_  
__**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume  
Tobitatsu kagerou Koi kogareru  
Anata wo omoeba Yume ni yume ni yume miru  
Afureru yorokobi Towa ni towa ni**__  
(Pale pink and tangled, in a dream, a midsummer night's dream  
A mayfly takes off, yearning for love  
When I think of you, I'm dreaming, dreaming, dreaming  
Joy overflowing, forever, forever)  
_

Clapping broke the boys out of their kiss and caused Watanuki to klutz out and fall yet again on his ass landing painfully and biting his tongue in the process. Gentle laughter assaulted his ears as both Yuuko and Doumeki chucked at his flushed face and disheveled appearance. He was suddenly pulled upward by Doumeki and launched into a rant of epic proportion when Yuuko teasingly chided him about getting a somewhat more private place to conduct debauchery.

_  
__**Usu beni midarete Manatsu no yoru no yume yume**__  
(Pale pink and tangled, it's a dream, a midsummer night's dream…)_

'_I was a fool for doubting him and myself and we both were fools for waiting so damn long weren't we Doumeki' _Watanuki thought to himself as he followed Yuuko and Doumeki back into where the others were. Yuuko gave him a look that said _'Yes my dear boy you were but he forgives you'_ Watanuki understood that look and nodded, smiling slightly and followed Doumeki out into the sunshine.

'_for you I wont disappear_'

XxXxXxXxX

ummm….meant for this to be all light and fluffy and funny and it came out all deep and introspective … …ahguh


	4. Song 4 Surrender

OMG's I'm back

Warning ANGST (in caps meaning there is lots of it) WataHima with (perceived) DouHima some one-sided DouWata as well

Disclaimer – don't own them (and after this don't think they want me to either) no suey the writer

Billy Talent - Surrender

"_Himawari is not your goddess of luck Watanuki"_

From when Watanuki first told Yuuko about Himawari until now Yuuko has ceaselessly said that Himawari and he were bound for ill fortune. No matter how many times he ranted and raved that Himawari was the goddess of beauty and love and all that was good and kind in the world Yuuko would unerringly say that She wasn't his goddess of good luck or insinuate that she was not interested in him in that way. It's not though any lack or fault on Watanuki's behalf really; he has every teenager's low self esteem in regards to his personal attractiveness and he really isn't that bad looking as Yuuko teasingly points out but she cautions him almost constantly. Looking back Watanuki thought that Yuuko was almost being Motherly in her worry over Watanuki's safety and wellbeing '_probably because she'll starve if I ever get tremendously hurt and cant work for a few days'_ he thought aggrievedly

_She reads a book from across the street,  
Waiting for someone that she'll never meet._

"Himawaaaaaaaaaari-Chan" calls Watanuki on his way to school every morning. Himawari's face lighting up with her joy in seeing him. _'Himawari is always so kind and cheerful' _Mused Watanuki _'in fact I daresay she is too kind inviting that JERK Doumeki along everywhere we go when I could have some serious alone time'_ he thought to himself pretty much every morning .

_  
Talk over coffee for an hour or two,  
She wonders why I'm always in a good mood._

Finally it happened the gods of luck (and love if he may daresay) were smiling down on him and he was able to treat Himawari to an afternoon at the Shoppe that just opened down the street from their school. He was practically floating down the street with her that afternoon and to even Himawari he was far more over-exuberant than normal in his gestures and responses to which she lightly commented on but said no more, glad for the distraction about her own state.

_  
Killin' time before she struts her stuff,  
She needs support and I've become the crutch._

Watanuki Knew there was something about Himawari not just her Brilliant smile or her gorgeous green eyes that Watanuki so adored. He had noticed things that were ….a little off but he casually dismissed it he was a seer after all and maybe he was over-analyzing every small detail of his life looking for some malignant spirit to come try and eat him. Himawari however knew and it hurt her to think she was using Watanuki shamelessly hooking onto him with her gestures and smile and keeping him there and she felt bad about it but being around Watanuki was like a drug and she couldn't stop his infectious smile or cheerful good mood when she was around him and it did make her feel better when he offered to make her cake or any sort of food but in her heart she knew it was only a matter of time before something happened and it would be both her fault and her undoing.

_  
She'll never know how much she means to me.  
I'd play the game but I'm the referee._

Its not that Himawari really had any preference between Doumeki and Watanuki they were both very dear to her. And she preferred to remain neutral in that way which invariably caused Watanuki to assume that she and Doumeki were ready to announce that they were going to date any day now, while she was trying as hard as she could to subtlety get those two together (cause it would be "just so cute") and she wouldn't have to worry about her luck.

Surrender

_Every word, every thought every sound._

She is the reprieve over a hot and muggy spring and the promise she bade him make weighed both heavily and lightly on his heart

_  
Surrender_

_Every touch, every smile, every frown._

Her smile was brighter then the sun more beautiful than the stars in the heavens and made him feel wonderful for hours afterward

_  
Surrender_

_All the pain we've endured until now._

She is always willing to listen to him about his day, dreams, the horrors he has to deal with, the never ending rant over Yuuko and Mokona and she is always encouraging him.

_  
Surrender_

_All the hope that I lost you have found._

She is his warmth on the winter day the confidence builder and the most incredibly cute person he could ever chance to know

_  
Surrender yourself to me._

So what could possibly go wrong?

Even though I know what I'm lookin' for,  
She's got a brick wall behind her door.

She is more aware then the average person may think about how Watanuki feels for her indeed it would take an extraordinarily dense individual not to see it but she can not, must not get close to him. She knows if she does that worse things could be in store but the blind love struck fool that Watanuki is simply doesn't see it yet and she needs to make him see now while there is still time and a Watanuki to see.

_  
I'd travel time and confess to her,  
But I'm afraid she'd shoot the messenger._

Unfortunately for the both of them that moment came and was passed with no word spoken of the dangers and the luck because Watanuki was _just so blind_

In his love

In his devotion

In his competitiveness

In possibly everything relating to Kunogi Himawari and due to her unfortunate bad luck she ended up causing the ill fated tumble though the second story window. _  
_

_  
Surrender _

_Every word, every thought every sound._

As his body falls though the window he has so many thoughts running though his head it's a wonder he is aware of his surroundings at all. He sees the sky utterly cloudless and almost painful in its intensity in the moments before impact. It almost seems as though time has slowed down while he falls the shards of glass impaling his body don't hurt yet and he can only marvel at that. The glitters of glass almost look like diamonds as do his tears the blood flowing looks almost like rubies or Yuuko's eyes and it contrasts sharply with the too-pale almost luminescent (_see through so see thruohmygodI'mgoingtodisappearafterall_) quality of his arm almost as painfully stark as the sky is blue. And he's

_  
Surrender _

_Every touch, every smile, every frown._

Falling he can dimly hear his name being called form below and above and still he

_  
Surrender _

_All the pain we've endured until now._

Falls and he knows the ground is coming at his fast but he still marvels at the feeling of weightlessness and the sick realization that he is in fact going to die and damn it all if he never confessed to Himawari or got his first kiss. He feels a brief fleeting surge of bitter hatred for Doumeki who would finally have Himawari to himself which melts into remorse that he

_  
Surrender _

_All the hope that I lost you have found._

Never bothered to become friends with Doumeki despite the baiting between them he did harbor a lot of respect for the archer… However he was damned if he would say it and now he would never be able to. Watanuki had to smile at that although in reality it looked more like a grimace and then he hit the ground

_  
Surrender yourself to me.  
_

_And he thought no more_

_  
I think I found a flower in a field of weeds,  
I think I found a flower in a field of weeds.  
Searching until my hands bleed,  
This flower don't belong to me.  
_

Doumeki reached him first having seen him falling running towards him face uncharacteristically full to overflowing with emotion running to beat the devil not wanting to be too late to save the boy he had come to love as fiercely as anyone. When he heard the bone shattering thud and the _shink snick_ of glass piercing his skin accompanied by the tinkle of broken glass cascading around him and the warbling high pitched anguished screams from Kunogi above him he though for a moment '_oh shit, Shit, SHITSHIT NO God no PLEASE GOD NO!!' _he ran up to the broken boy and fell to his knees beside him breaking the glass surrounding him further and cutting himself in the process but in his misery he didn't seem to notice his blood mingling with Watanuki's. His mind could only brokenly repeat 'toolatetoolateiwastoolateohgodhe'sgoneIwastoolate' he felt a brief bright surge of hatred for Kunogi for causing this and an equally bright flare for Watanuki for never fucking noticing what had been right in front of his damn face all this time but both were quickly snuffed out when he saw Watanuki breathing shallowly and he heard Yuuko say in his mind _'All is not yet lost bring him to me and bring Himawari too if you want to save him' _Doumeki held back any biting mental retort he would have made and hoisted Watanuki up feeling how sickeningly light he was like was going to disappear (_ohgodohgoddontdieiloveyoudontleaveme_) he saw Kunogi running towards him her face as pale and bloodless as Watanuki's. With a curt motion of his head he bade her follow him and he took off at a dead run cradling Watanuki's still form as gently as he could while running to the shop.

_  
I think I found a flower in a field of weeds,  
I think I found a flower in a field of weeds.  
Searching until my hands bleed,  
This flower don't belong to me.  
This flower don't belong to me._

_All was black it was encompassing, absolute, stifling Watanuki could no more see though it than he could see his own hands an inch in front of his face. Then the Pain hit him and his eyes flew open pupils narrowing to pinpoints with the pain and shock and he thought he was going to pass out again. But then the pain receded to a dull ache throughout his body centering on his heart his eyes tearing up. He saw his parents reaching out towards him their arms strangely covered in blood like that day (1) he wanted to go with them so badly and he started to cry harder when he was told that he couldn't and before he could follow them he was stopped by the guy in the weird clothing (2) then he felt a strange pull and the guy said as the world went grey "Lets meet again in a real dream" and then the world went white._

_  
Why could she belong to me?  
_

Himawari had a very clear metal picture that she's never told anyone. It's part of a recurring dream that she has had ever since the incident with the window._ She sees herself standing in front of Watanuki in their winter uniforms; Watanuki is standing with his arms outstretched with a happy smile plastered on his face holding a huge sunflower saying "for you" and his hands are bleeding profusely. (3) There is blood pooling on the ground in front of her and blood dripping off of the Sunflower carefully cradled in his injured hands. Himawari has her hands to her face trying to hold back the sobs of anguish as she stares at the bright red drops falling as ceaselessly form his hands as clear tears are form her eyes._ She usually wakes up then, with tears pooling at the corner of her eyes and soaking into her pillow holding back those selfsame sobs in the real world trying not to wake her parents and cause them any more worry over her.

He woke up and let his eyes adjust to his surroundings, still a bit blurry without his glasses, his whole body ached and he could barely move. Turning his head he saw Yuuko who told him that he was alive and the price to return him from the brink had already been paid. Himawari walked in and Yuuko left for the moment

She said that she was the cause of all his bad luck when he was around her

_  
Every word, every thought every sound._

She said that she has caused many severe injuries even deaths

_  
Every touch, every smile, every frown._

She said that he was one of her first and best friends

_  
All the pain we've endured until now._

She tried to say goodbye and called him an idiot when he refused to let her go

_  
All the hope that I lost you have found.  
_

She, crying, feeling the scars that would never fade on her back though that the happiest moment of her life was when Watanuki said _"Because I like you the most I won't let you cry." _

_  
Surrender_

_Every word, every thought every sound._

He realized that her luck was almost as deadly as being around spirits

_  
Surrender_

_Every touch, every smile, every frown._

He saw now the aura of bad luck that surrounds her like a pall

_  
Surrender _

_All the pain we've endured until now._

Being with her could only cause more hardship and pain for them both

_  
Surrender_

_All the hope that I lost you have found._

He realized he didn't care one iota and loved her just as much as before and would do anything for her.

_  
(Surrender)_

_I never had the nerve to ask,  
(Surrender) _

_Has my moment come and passed?_

He now knew the history of Himawari, still loved her but knew that if he ever tried to be with her she would reject it on very plausible grounds mind you but that wouldn't stop him from trying

_  
(Surrender)_

_I never had the nerve to ask,  
(Surrender) _

_Has my moment come and passed?_

She knew that he would always feel _that way_ for her that special way and all she could do was call him an idiot

_  
(Surrender)_

_I never had the nerve to ask,  
(Surrender) _

_Has my moment come and passed?_

He sees much says little and still harbors that hopeless love for him. He knows that probably he will never returned he sentiments but he can't help but hope that one day he will. He doesn't regret saving him he never will no price is too high weather it be an eye or blood or even limb or life he will sacrifice it for his one special person selfish as he may be in that thought.

(Surrender)

_I never had the nerve to ask._

_1. I'm theorizing that the accident left its impression on Watanuki even though he's given up his memory of that time_

_2. I don't know if Watanuki recognized Haruka in the manga or not as he had the appearance of 5 years of age so thus what I wrote_

_3. I've drawn that…and it is a horribly disturbing picture in fact it is what inspired the story. I wonder if that makes me an equally disturbing individual._

AN- I am a horrible, horrible person I know I am. This is so chalk full of Angst (angst, angst, angst, angity, angst, angst, angst… say it with me now) an admittedly normal person would cry…I think…. I honestly don't think I made it angsty enough in fact I rather feel like I've downplayed it (and yet I sit here complacently thinking on how to torture the characters next) although I'm neither normal nor admit to it, it is a pretty and sad song and the circumstances are rather sad (and cliché… but still). Please don't ask where this came from cause I wont tell you (not knowing comes into play my muse and I work wonderfully together …when she's around) I love the song (me and my emo music I tells ya) and it struck me as a WataHima song


End file.
